5 Reasons We Love To Hate Spambots.

5 Reasons We Love To Hate Spambots.
We will defeat your super-hotness and offers for affordable teeth whitening. Dear e77s8ggm, I hope this letter finds you well. Well, I’m pretty sure you’re well because in your profile picture, you’re half-naked, and I can almost see your entire area. No lie? Pretty hot. But I can’t...

5 Ways Twitter Lists Can Defeat Douchebags.

5 Ways Twitter Lists Can Defeat Douchebags.
No iPhone app can make him less off putting. As you read this, the world of Twitter trembles. People unsure of the future.  People wondering what to do. All because TwitJesus gave us lists. It nearly sent me into cardiac arrest. I know. How alarmingly nerdy! Lists are a way to organize people on Twitter....

5 Reasons To Never Tweet Drunk.

5 Reasons To Never Tweet Drunk.
I know this one person on Twitter who is a well-regarded ‘social media maven’. I won’t say his name. Let’s call him Randy. Through the day, Randy is informative, smart and helpful. He tweets Mashable links and will assist you in finding a new WordPress plugin. At night, Randy...

5 Reasons Why The New “Suggestions” Are Ruining Facebook

5 Reasons Why The New “Suggestions” Are Ruining Facebook
If you logged into Facebook recently, you’d notice you have a box called “Suggestions” on the right-hand side. It’s where coolness goes to die. Inside this box, Facebook “suggests” that you do certain things. Like add someone nobody wants to add. Write on the wall...

How Facebook Killed Birthdays.

How Facebook Killed Birthdays.
I now play a sport. My mom told me it could help offset my over-eating. My feedings, as she calls them. So I play co-ed flag football with a variety of people who appear to not like me very much. Maybe because I wear these really tight gym shorts with my package protruding out of it. Whatever.  That’s...

Announcing The Twitter Halloween Costume Contest!

Announcing The Twitter Halloween Costume Contest!
I like Halloween. The scary ghouls and goblin crap I don’t care for. The candy I like. I turn off my house lights and stay very still in my parents basement so kids just pass by. That’s mean.  They’re just tiny kids. Yeah, but those shithead kids want candy. So as they tirelessly...

If Twitter Told The Truth.

If Twitter Told The Truth.
I’m a big fan of TwitJesus. The three individuals that come together like Voltron to govern all of Twitter land. Evan, Biz, and Jack. But I know they run a nice, polite company that would never say anything untoward. But I sure as shit would. Which is why I took the liberty of writing for them. Here...

5 Things Twitter Can Learn From Balloon Boy.

5 Things Twitter Can Learn From Balloon Boy.
Last Thursday, millions of people were arrested in fear. Gripped by a tiny boy who may have been in a balloon. Did he fall out? Is he dead? Falcon? Who names a kid Falcon.  Really. We suspended work to watch a hideous-looking Jiffy Pop balloon fly across Colorado.  When it landed, Falcon was nowhere...

The 5 Worst DMs: Which Ones Have You Sent?

The 5 Worst DMs: Which Ones Have You Sent?
It’s exciting to get a DM on Twitter. Don’t lie. You think it’s exciting to get a DM on Twitter. When I get one, I rush to check who sent it. In my mind, I always think it’s Evan Williams, the CEO of Twitter, who will write and say: Hey Tremendous News, I’ve been monitoring...

10 Things To Do When Twitter Is Down.

10 Things To Do When Twitter Is Down.
Right. Like someone's not high at Twitter HQ. Twitter goes down. You spiral emotionally, unsure. Uncertain. What do I do now? When affronted with the fail whale, your nerdy world unravels. Don’t worry. I’m here. Allow me to bring you into my electrical bosom and nurture you with my words. Care...

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