New Prenatal Blood Test Causing Uproar.

New Prenatal Blood Test Causing Uproar.
In the before times, if you wanted to check the health status of your unborn baby you had to have an invasive procedure.  Something that included scraping. Really?  Anything that includes the word ‘scraping’ can’t be much fun. Coming this summer, is a new prenatal test that can...

Swiss Bank UBS Set To Totally Rat Out Customer Names.

Swiss Bank UBS Set To Totally Rat Out Customer Names.
Swiss banking has always been known as a fortress of secrecy.  Want to run guns to Cuba?  Just funnel your receipts to a Swiss bank.  Coke dealer?  Ask for the Coke Dealer Premium Account.  It was a tremendous little set-up. Not anymore. Although UBS, the flagship banking giant of Switzerland,...

Beat The Shit Out of Bernie Madoff For $99.

Beat The Shit Out of Bernie Madoff For $99.
In a retarded breakthrough in toy innovation, you can purchase a miniature Bernie Madoff figurine that you can beat the shit out of. The only problem? You probably have no money to buy it. That was a low, cheap shot. I know that if you were bilked by Bernie Madoff and his disproportionately long and...

GM, Chrysler Beg for More.

The two automakers pleaded with the government to give them $7B in more federal money or they claim that they’ll file for bankruptcy within six weeks. Six weeks. The plan to use the federal money includes laying off 50, 000 employees. Overall, it could be just delaying the inevitable as $7B seems...

Facebook Bows to Nerdy Pressure, Changes Terms of Service

The unfettered rage from Facebook users across the world has made the site change it’s Terms of Service. It is now free of the provision that allows Facebook to totally own your ass and everything you may have uploaded to the site over the last few years. So you know your horrible Halloween...

Sirius Satellite Rescued: Nerdy Radio Listeners Rejoice.

Sirius XM, the satellite radio company, was about to file for bankruptcy protection this morning.  They needed to come up with a little cash to pay off some loans.  And by ‘little cash’ I mean the gross domestic product of Ireland.   So it’s safe to say they were a little worried. Mel...

Old Article Sends United Airlines Stocks Plummeting.

Old Article Sends United Airlines Stocks Plummeting.
Imagine, for a moment, you work for the South Florida Sun-Sentinel. Your job is to upload old articles into the Archive section of your website. Apparently, you forget to archive one of them in the Archive section, it leaks onto your main site, and 4.6 seconds later it’s picked up by the Bloomberg...

Nerds Launch Protons Through Tunnel

Nerds Launch Protons Through Tunnel
Who would have thought you would have come this far? Why do we care about nerds in Switzerland? Because they are trying to understand how the universe began. The $3.8 Billion tunnel, nicknamed The Large Hadron Collider (the nerds actually think that name is ‘funny’), is supposed to emulate the...

FIRED: The Prime Minister of Thailand.

Drunk with power, he could not resist telling you how a smidgen of basil could punch up your pesto. Prime Minister Samak Sundaravejevejevejmanathanlingam, whose name I just remixed because it`s too fucking long anyway, accepted payments for appearing on a national cooking show. This offended...

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