Missed Conan O’Brien on 60 Minutes last night?
NBC and Leno may have orchestrated his last mess, but he’s the only one to blame for this interview. I’m a fan of Conan. I really am.
But this was just awful.
Here are five reasons why this interview was a bad mistake.
1. Nobody Can Relate To A Red Beard.
We adore the fluffy white beard of Santa Claus and fear the evil white beard of Wolf Blitzer. But not red.
Red’s too much.
2. If You Can’t Talk Then Don’t.
I completely understand that Conan signed a contract which prohibits him from disparaging NBC and Leno. But then why talk? Wait until it’s over, talk then.
We don’t need it now. We’re still exhausted from car bombs in Time Square, oil leaks, the Monopoly money of Greece. We can wait.
It was kind of like watching Rodney King say LAPD? Not so bad.
3. It Didn’t Galvanize His Base.
The most interesting part of the Conan affair is his frenzied fan base. On Facebook and Twitter, millions supported him by changing their avatars, talking about him, crying all over themselves.
These people did everything but watch him.
That’s all they had to do. If they just watched him on NBC, his ratings would’ve been good enough.
In this 60 Minutes piece, Conan could have said I know I have a lot of support out there. But this time, instead of PhotoShop-ing your hair red in your profile picture, maybe just watch my show?
4. It Made People Empathize With NBC. (But Still Not Leno (We Can Never Like Him))
If the piece did anything, it helped me understand why NBC did what they did. They had a massive Leno contract and a not-as-massive Conan contract. They took the cheaper route then spun it so their investors didn’t axe the execs.
Made total sense.
But since I like Conan, I wanted him to say I get why NBC had to do it. But what I didn’t appreciate was when they said I lost money. Here’s how that’s not true.
And then Conan goes to a whiteboard while Kevin Kroft stares at him, blinking. Conan does the math, carries the one. Differentiates some shit. Then Kevin says dude, you’re like totally right! Then Conan says I know bitch!
And they eat cheese cubes together.
Tell me that wouldn’t have been cool.
5. It Served Absolutely No Purpose.
I was trying to understand why Conan decided to do 60 Minutes.
To promote his new show on TBS? He touched on it once and didn’t even sound excited.
To tell his side of the story? Nope. Contract. Couldn’t do it.
To promote the tour? It’s already sold out.
It felt like we were watching a jilted lover just coming out of a relationship who just wanted someone to listen.
That’s not a good look for a dude.
I know many of you are die-hard Coco supporters and would like to wound my emoticons right now. But think about it. Was that really a good interview for Conan?
Hurt me on Twitter here.