5 Signs You’re Part Of An Internet Fad.

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Nothing could be more hilarious.

Nobody wants to believe that they’re part of a fad.

It’s this weird thing about us. Humans. We feel like if we’re part of something that was wildly popular for a fleeting moment, we just got suckered.

Cuckolded.

And I’ll be damned if I get cuckolded again.

But you might be part of a fad. Facebook, Twitter, they could be fads. That hilariously demented naughty site you go on when your parents aren’t home? Possibly a fad.

Although let’s hope not.

The Internet is about right now.

Right now we want to read short electrical messages from Ashton Kutcher. Right now we want to view tagged photos of chicks who rejected us but still allowed us to add them to Facebook. Right now we want to play Mafia Wars.

Fine.

Some of us are just assholes.

But whatever we want right now, changes tomorrow. Think about the fallen Internet heroes of yesterday.

The days when Yahoo was the shit.

Ha!

Yahoo.

Prodigy Online. CompuServ. Friendster. Hell, even MySpace.

We wanted them. Used them. Sucked the fun out of them. Then discarded them.

And we’ll do it again.

Tomorrow, if someone douchier than me starts “waymoretremendousnews.com”, and he writes about stuff you actually care about, I’m done.

I’ll probably have to move back with my parents and—

Well something bad will happen.

The point is, I know this. I’m ready for it. And I can point out the signs.

Here they are. The five signs you’re part of an Internet fad.

1. People Are Way Too Into It.

Internet fads are started by what I call the nerdy douche. These people live and breathe the phenomenon so much, it’s alarming. They’re the ones with the T shirts they get custom-printed to announce to the world how much they enjoy the current fad.

This is because without the current fad, nobody talks to these people.

But now that they’re Internet stars, they can wear a T shirt, take a picture of it and use it for their avatar.

Yes.

Because that’s what we need.

2. People Are Scared When Something Else Comes Out.

When Google Buzz came out and people called it the “Twitter Killer”, thousands of people on Twitter grew frightened. If Buzz actually killed Twitter, all of those days they spent getting super hot spambot followers would be wasted.

Tons of people on Twitter secretly hope Google Buzz will fail.

And the rest are buying Buzz T Shirts and taking pictures of themselves for their avatars.

I told you.

It’s how it starts.

3. The Spam Surprises You With Its Creativity.

Internet fads end when the service loses its epic battle against spam. It happened to Friendster when webcam chicks became so overpowering that you either had to shut down your Friendster account or have your seventeenth private cam show with Roxy from Vegas.

I think I put Roxy’s kids through college.

Facebook and Twitter are doing a better job at battling back. But the spambots improvise. They start to learn the weaknesses, and become even more super hot.

Right now the webcam chicks, teeth whiteners and affiliate marketers are held at bay. But as soon as they call for Nigerian banker back-up, it’s over.

4. It’s Called A “Game-Changer.”

When a social media “expert” is calling your service a game changer on his horrible weekly podcast nobody watches, look out.

It’s the death wish.

5. It Becomes Corporate.

Facebook and Twitter were started by regular people. It wasn’t a company launching a new service. It was some nerdy dudes who probably argued about which “CSS syle sheet” to use at a Starbucks in San Mateo.

That’s what made it cool.

But when corporations take over, and I mean fully over, it feels hollow.

You need to know that the people running your service are just as dumb as you are. It’s what makes it real.

photo by lauren friedman

There you have it. The signs you might be part of an Internet fad.

You can send me your short, electrical hate on Twitter here.

Especially if you’re wearing a custom-made T shirt in your profile picture.

Because that’s just hilarious.

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Question for my hurtful commenters: Do you think Facebook and/or Twitter are ‘fads’?  Also, are any of you super hot chicks that want me to like, do stuff to you?


  • SwedishChef

    Yeah well I know Roxy personally. Her kids dropped out of college after one semester. She spent the rest on a mixture of botox and whisky & soda. You can sleep easy.

  • "Way too into it". Ever look at the Spread Firefox site? There are methods that the virgin geeks have come up with that, if stepped up, would impress fanatical Muslims. Right now, they include vandalism, intrusion, trespassing, littering, spamming, other words ending in -ing, and basic obnoxiousness. Despite these kids without lives, Firefox thrives. I wrote articles trying to tell them to watch it, they'll bring it down. Either they listened (not bloody likely) or finally discovered sex with other people and left the evangelism alone.

  • deb

    "Also, are any of you super hot chicks that want me to like, do stuff to you?"

    You know, Tremendous, I am actually a fan. But when you write a sentence like the one above, I tend to lose respect for you. When I first found your blog, I told people that you were my new favorite blogger. But when you write this sort of material, I have to take it back. Trust me, I am not some bra-burning feminist at all. I can totally take a joke. And I really love most of your material. I just hope that I can look forward to calling you one of my new favorite bloggers in the future.

  • ha! it's all so true, and yeah a little scary each time we have to make the change. the other clue your fad is fleeting is when your mom, aunts and grandmothers start embracing it. then it's over, done, kaput.
    P.S.- does this mean i have to abandon yahoo? i'm still not getting why the bad rap. seriously, what i am missing here.

  • “Game-Changer.” When nerdy nerds use sports-like terms to nerd out, I get chills.

  • Very very funny, I must admit I love this "I’ll probably have to move back with my parents and—Well something bad will happen." Please don't do this to those poor folks. They already had to put up with you for the past umpteen years. :) You are a very funny writer and that my dear man is worth miles (years) before someone could take over your tremendousnews.com

  • Actually, you probably bought Roxy new implants.

  • draug419

    I think Twitter is closer to becoming a fad than Facebook, but that's not stopping me from using it. But it's like buying one format of a movie and then buying that same movie when it comes out on the newest, better format. Eventually people are going to tire of maintaining twenty different versions of the same account on twenty different social medias which are, at their cores, the same damn social media in different suits. But then maybe that will leave room for something new and completely different to pop up.

    Oh, and is that a cake pictured or a play-doh sculpture? Epic randomness either way.

  • I adore you for using the phrase "CSS Stylesheet". I don't care what the rest of the article is about, I must RT it on that virtue alone. All hail CSS.

    By the way, CSS means Cascading Style Sheets. You might want to say CSS document or file next time. Just sayin'

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