Can A Polar Bear Defeat A Tiger?

The only thing this polar bear is defeating is the threat of extinction.  Wait.  No, hes losing that too.  Ha!

The only thing this polar bear is defeating is the threat of extinction. Wait. No, hes losing that too. Ha!

Over the weekend, I engaged in an important conversation.

As the elections in India ushered in new hope, as the rebel Tamil Tigers were defeated in Sri Lanka, as America prepared for the onslaught of new H1N1 cases.

I discussed whether a polar could defeat a tiger one-on-one.

And the answer is simple.  The answer is so clear that this blog post is moot.  That this blog post is trivial.  So unneeded.

Much like my entire site.

The tiger would totally kick the polar bear’s ass.

Think about it.  What’s a polar bear fighting?  A trout?  A stupid-ass seal?  Those things with the big tusks coming out of their mouth?  What are those called again?  Walruses?  It’s Walruses right?

Thank you.

First, the tiger is used to crushing the cerebral cortexes of hundreds of dangerous animals.  Hyenas, jackals, other tigers.  Do you know tigers can beat the shit out of other tigers?  What’s a polar bear fighting?

Extinction.

Ha!

Extinction.

During this nerdy argument, one individual raised the point: a polar bear is huge, so it’ll just grab the tiger and crush it.  Also, you’re drinking all our beer.  Didn’t you bring your own?  We specifically said this was BYOB.

He’s wrong.  About the polar bear.  It’s true about the beer.  I’m pretty cheap.

The polar bear would have to get the tiger into some cool headlock or something to crush it.  There’s no way that’s happening. Polar bears are slow and lumbering.  They can’t maneo- they can’t maneu-  they can’t move around fast enough to get the tiger into a suplex.  So the tiger would just jump for the polar bear’s throat, squeeze a bit, and boom.  Deadness.

Is there anything on this site that has to do with news?  How is this relevant to me, the creepy reader?

It’s important because in this argument, I was one of the few who believed in the tiger.  I was attacked by individuals who believed in the polar bear.  This blog is the only way to collect validation for my outrageously correct viewpoint.

How do you unsubscribe to Tremendous News?  It’s really gotten just absolutely unreadable.

Just agree with me.

Or posts like this don’t ever stop.

This tiger is totally bringing it.

This tiger is totally bringing it.


  • don rick

    Will I did some research on this subject. It turns out that Siberian tigers will attack and kill female brown bears when they are in hibernation. but that is not what we want to know because these are male tigers preying on female brown bears that are in hibernation. So these fights are not fear ones. The difference in sexes of size and strength are very great. Bengal tigers and Indian bears get into fights some times the Bengal Tiger wins, sometimes the Indian Bears will win. With all fairness most of the time the Bengal Tigers wins. I have seen video's of Bengal tigers killing Indian Bears in most cases these are Male Bengal Tigers preying on Female Indian Bears. but The Indian Bear are a lot smaller then Polar Bears or Brown Bear so that has to be took in consideration. Female Lions vs Heyena fight are actually even matchups. Heyeans will kill female Lions if they get the chance. If the Male Lion is too far away to protect his pide. It is the Male Lions the difference in size of a male lion and a female lion is almost double in size and strength. Male Lions will kill Heyeans with ease. But sometimes A gang of Heyeans will corner 1 male Lion or a few male Lions that maybe injured or old and may kill a male Lion. I think if a Heyena was equal in size with a male Lion. I think these fights would go more in favor of the heyena slightly.

  • Hydrangea

    Tigers vs big bears.

    Fighter planes beating any other planes, by size advantage? or something like agility?

  • Edd683

    Sounds like you have graeat parties. Oh . I vote Polar Bear.

  • Hydrangea

    Tigers are capable of killing large preys such as Rhino, gaur, elephant, female or calf. Even an elephant calf is born, will weigh about 1 ton, or 2200lbs.

    So tigers can kill something 5 or 6 times their own weights.

    And tigers are agile and smart fighter. I don't think when a tiger runs into a large bear, brown or polar it would attack it head on. If you've seen how a tiger kills a buffalo/gaur, it would circumvent it to avoid its horns, try to get on its back and manage to kill it that way.

    In "Animals Face Off", tigers get killed easily by lions, because the lion has manes to protect itself. And it  also get killed quickly by a grizzly, because the grizzly breaks the tiger's spine.

    In both cases, we don't see the agility of the tigers, but simply head on confrontation by the tigers.

    These "scientific"  results are from the same lab.

    But tigers kill lions easily, and the results are overwhelming. Because tigers fight smartly.

    In the same token, polar bears move slowly, because they have to conserve heat, they would over heat after fighting with a fast moving tiger. And tiger's swipes and bites are deadly enough for any bears, 2000 pounds at most?

    I am not discounting large bears' sizes or strength, they have chances to win, but at much lower success rates than that of tigers.

    In fact even some human being have records beating tigers and lepards "bare handed". But what is the probability? 1ppm or less.

  • Gaboroballo

    Your a stupid idiot, bears fight other bears and wolves. And also dumb ass, tigers are all fighting extinction so shut the fuck up!!! Bears would sooooo win!!!

  • A Verrender

    experiments have shown polar bear can beat lion (with ease) and i have it on good authority that lion vs tiger is no certain contest (it goes either way, depending on the individual of each species).
    I'd say a lucky tiger could win, but if the polar bear lands a hit, it'll be game over. That was the problem with lion vs polar bear-the polar bear would crush the lions skull in one hit.

  • george

    your whole arguement sucks. First off, a tiger could not kill a walrus, they are 2 ton and nasty. second of all a polar bear can be 2000 pounds and stand 13 feet tall, they also run 35 mph, They are not slow, they are very quick and agile and smart. To say that a tiger has the power to kill a polar bear but the polar bear doesnt have the strength to kill a tiger is retarded. Hyenas and jackals are turds, a polar bear would eat 10 of them at a time. It wouldnt be close, polar bears are the apex of the food chain and are the largest most powerful carnivours on planet earth, Tiger would be lunch.

  • Venue, baby, venue! In a frozen ocean the polar bear wins and the tiger drowns after hypothermia sets in. In India, Tiger has a good shot, waiting around for the inevitable heat stroke. Do I get a bonus beer for pointing out the obvious?

  • Bobbi

    The polar bear is the strongest most aggressive animal on earth....the tiger doesn't stand a chance.

  • Sabihjamal

    the polar bear not the strongest and not the most aggressive brown bear is the strongest and the tiger is the most aggressive predator on land the polar bear is a coward who runs away from brown bears or does not even goes near a walrus over 2500lbs and ti is not 13 feet it is10ft and 1200lbs it is slow and not used to fighting big cats are pound to pound better then any bear and have a over 3 ton strike force it will move around a bear get on top of it and bite the back of it,s neck the bear will be knocked down  before a throat bit kills it and a tigers have been recorded to kill rhinos much more then walrus so get real

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